The Venn Diagram of Love

I called Lileng a few days ago and she noted some thoughts after our 2hr conversation. Thanks buddy for sharing! It is always nice talking to you.

"the venn diagram of love. imagine 2 circles categories of love. one is the tangible qualities of the partner. ie. intelligence, external appearance, wealth, promise of stability and faithful love, in short, anything that is tangible and of valuable quality. the second is the intangible chemistry and sparks with the partner. the unbelievable romanticism and korean drama type of feeling simply by being with the person, even when doing the simplest of things.

the question is, which is more important, and which would i value more? a realist would opt for the first, because of the tangible qualities, and an idealist would opt for the second, because of the eletricity with the person. but what is love? it is difficult to define and it differs person to person. and sometimes, the tangible qualities are what creates the chemistry. i used to think that they are quiet difficult to distinguish and it’s a large patch of grey area. but i can see the lines defining them better now.

there are numerous possibilities. what if i think the person i am with is the one, because i haven’t really experienced the true electricity. and later in my life, i meet the person who electrifies me? then again, one would ask, is the chemistry that that that important. i probably wont settle with someone if i have zero chemistry with that person, so would i want to trade everything tangible that the person have, including the bit of chemistry i have with him, for 100% chemistry and less tangible stuff?

so how important are the tangible stuff really? i have many questions swimming in my head. how important are the tangible stuff? what do i want out of my relationship and marriage? would i even have this dilemma of having to choose between the tangible and the intangible? and if i do, would i be a realist of idealist and live to regret that i did not make a different choice? "